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thatchinesegirl
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Interests: volunteering, socializing with friends, penpalling, travelling, photography, watching indepedent and foreign films, learning about cultures and languages, debating and politics, and lately sleep...
Expertise: Blah- inquire to acquire =D
Occupation: Student
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
3/10/2003
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| I still cannot figure out how to type Chinese font and have it appear as Chinese font on my blog. Even when I typed the Chinese characters, once it goes into the journal, it doesn't seem to work. Perhaps, someone can enlighten me on this matter.
Lately, I've been really into Daiso and the dollar store.=) I love that store- precisely because there's so many things that I can buy from it! Daiso is a great Japanese store- with tons of goodies. I love buying stuff from there- ranging from pet food for my fishes to organizing bins for storage, to photo albums, to snacks-- bahhh. Everything seems really cheap and I am always up for a bargain! I was so happy when I saw Daiso opening up a store near my house. Yay!!! It's probably my favorite chain store in Japan- because everything is only 105 yen or over here it is slightly more at 1.50, but the quality of the items beats the dollar store. I really shouldn't say its cheap though because despite it being 1 dollar per item- i always end up spending much more there--- maybe this dollar store "re" craze will go away soon. until then!
also heroes rocks! i love that show! cant way to see what happens and what sylar's doing. | | |
| It has been nearly four months since I've graduated UC Berkeley. Equally, it has been four months since I've last updated this blog. This blog entry is SO overdued so I apologize for the delay.
Graduation night was a lot of fun. I went out clubbing in San Francisco with some friends. It was nice to ese everyone even though I felt myself shouting half the time when I was inside the club. The club was not that great, but the company is what's most important. The neatest thing about it was the glass floor, but I don't think the girls with skirts liked the idea of such a floor on the 2nd floor of the club. (go figure) and go figure again for a guy friend pointing this fact to me. Haha. Gosh, where and what was he thinking!
My parents also threw me a nice dinner with family and friends. Finally, a four year journey completed, but I feel in many ways, life has just begun and it only gets more complex each and every day.
I spent the past summer travelling to different parts of the world, namely Asia. Instead of doing the traditional European backpacking summer trip after college graduation, I opted for several small trips to Asia and domestically instead. First, it was cheaper this way because my US dollars truly cannot afford the British pound and for the expensive-ness of European places... and the euro. I just wish my benjamins actually carried me farther. Maybe and hopefully someday it will be better --- I can only hope! Anyhow, upon graduation I took several trips including:
In May, I went to Japan and Taiwan. In Taiwan, I ran into a school friend (Rachel) at the mall! It was quiet funny that I ran into her at the mall in Taipei and even more funny that it doesn't surprise me- the first thing she said to me besides hi was "hey wanna go clubbing" lol. I also spent a week in Japan (Tokyo namely), but I got a chance to visit Mt. Fuji for the first time. We had such a great tour guide and I really loved the hospitality that Japanese people offer in Japan. Because of their graciousness, I often feel like I need to do more -- daily self improvement to improve the way I communicate and treat others. It's also amazing how safe Japan is compared to other places around the world! In Taiwan, I also felt pretty safe and enjoyed the lovely street food- I especially loved the Shilin Night market. and LOVED bargaining and buying cheap clothes and goodies. I bought shirts for $1.50 USD! I was so happy. Naturally, they aren't the best quality, but it's just a great deal for cheap finds that add some flavor to my generally black and neutral color clothing. I also spent a week in Vegas, hung out in vegas, gambled the penny slots because i dont know any other game table nor can i fork up the buy ins hahaha, and i watched a cirque solei show call "beatles". its really good and quite different from their other shows in the past!
In June, I returned back and worked the rest of the summer till August. I bid farewell to my coworkers, and onwards I went on a cruise to Alaska on Celebrity. it was a lot of fun, and seriously Alaska is probably one of the most prettiest states I've been to... I did some cool things that i didn't think I'd ever do such as go on a super high, super speedy zip line in Hoonah Alaska. I also went kayaking as I love water sports in Juneau. I had a great trip in Alaska and unlike most cruisers, I came back and LOSt instead of gain weight! I was pretty happy, but it was probably the diet/ healthy option bar that I frequented-- they had an awesome blueberry dessert.
In August, I spent a weekend + a few days in new Orleans for psp's national convention and grand chapter. it was nice to see other Brothers again from other chapters and to spend time with my big and friends. Candi went as well and it was nice to have more people from delta omega show up. I had fun touring the french quarter thru the ghost tour as well as the many nice restaurants that we went to..some were very reasonably priced for all the good food and super big portions! the seafood there was really good but i cant imagine how good it would be for my cholestrol level lol.
In August, I also got an opportunity to go to Asia and HK and China on a ethnic chinese leadership conference. I was really happy that I got a chance to go and the sponsors/program paid for the trip except for the airfare to asia. It was such a great opportunity to make new friends and to talk to other chinese folks worldwide. i learned so much from that week that I cannot sum up here. I had such a great time meeting people and talking to them about their ethnic culture and what it means to be chinese- whether it was fellow americans or others from places like australia, canada, and southeast asia- singapore, indonesia, malaysia etc. i felt a renewed interest in my chinese culture and got a chance to practice my mandarin and cantonese. I even learned how to sing classic chinese songs such as ?????I really recommend the conference to folks that are interested in learning more about their cultural heritage. as a result of the conference, i made lasting friends and felt that despite our difference in backgrounds, our forefathers have contributed a lot to the development of our world. Being in places such as Henan ??, ??????is so different than actually just reading about it in the books. I felt connected- and also felt a responsibility as a fortunate, young person to give back and to shape the world thru my footsteps. I felt that it's not enough to be knowledgable about something, but it's even more important to understand what it means to have that knowledge- and the responsibilities that come with getting an education, or living in an area free from war and violence- it means a lot more than many people I've seen over the course of this trip and others in the past.
Coming back, I started my evening classes that will lead up to a masters in asian studies. I'm quiet excited about it, but what separates graduate seminars from traditional undergraduate classes is the amount of reading that i actually am expected to read and the leadership and initiative that i need to take to lead discussions within seminar , but also to start a dialogue of discourse within my classmates. there is less structure which could be good or bad for me --since having structure helps at times. 1 class is on the media and asia and another one is on the development of asia.
I'm also always about self improvement so I enrolled in a personal finance class online that starts next week. I dont want t be one of those broke seniors that are struggling to make ends meet. iw ant to retire happy and be able to pursue everything especially travel. given that my mom has been reminding me that "you're not getting any youngeR" "you look way older than 22 -- and trust me my asian eyes can tell another asian person apart" or "blah, you're getting old , i see your wrinkles", maybe now is the time to plan!! better start now or never right?
I've been a bit busy, but I've been trying to hangout and reconnect with some friends as well. I had a great time the other night with my friend Doug , Lan, and Randall. Doug even brought his friend Jessica along so it was nice to meet her too. Sushi House is great as usual- and fairly cheap compared to other sushi places I've been to. i love their lion king roll!
Outside of being busy , I've also got three guppies in a small tank in my room. yup, new pets! to add on what some of my friends call as a "zoo" at my house. i love fishes, and even brought a breeding small box tank, except my fish arent breeding! DARN DARN DARN. so much for the buy 1 fish , get 10 for free slogan eh? Maybe someday they will heheh, but it seems like when I bring a male guppie in, they or someone dies in the mishaps - perhaps because of increased competition in the tank- im not really sure why, but yeah-- it affects the tank harmony. when its all females in the tank, someone gets bullies but at least they live! hmmm, i wonder if that says anything about human life heehe.
I've also been trying to eat more healthy and sleep more. lately, ive been sleeping WAY too much. WAY too much. I've also developed an interest in playing Wii! it's so fun !!!! and great excercise especially playing the boxing game and the dodging game. i completely suck at wii baseball but that does not suprise me bc i suck at baseball in real life. i wanna try the wii yoga sometime too! I also sucked at the wii snowboarding game, but i been snowboarding once in real life and absolutely S***** at it too! hahaha.
I miss many folks as it seems like people have moved on and intot heir separate ways. hopefully trying to rekindle and reconnect with folks still in the bay! | | |
| Haviland Hall has been the home of my de-cal course I teach and facilitate for the last two semesters. I had perhaps one of the best conversations I had with a stranger in the course of my four years at Berkeley. When talking to this man who happens to be a career custodian at UC Berkeley, I thought of the struggles that my parents have gone through to ensure me to attend a place of priviledge.
Perhaps, one of the greatest lessons I told my students at the end of class is that attending Berkeley, and in taking the course, I hope that they will reflect, be brave, and venture and interact with the community. Like it or not, berkeley is their home for four years. If we don't see something, we as a community should work towards building bridges and improving things- not just sit in idle while things occur. When we attend a great school like Berkeley, we also have a responsibility for those who will never have an opportunity to attend Berkeley, attend college, or have the luxury of sitting in a classroom discussing and debating about the affairs we have seemingly removed ourselves from while many of us are at Berkeley. My challenge as I close a chapter of my life and begin a new one is to welcome the unknown and to remain humble no matter where life takes me.
Chatting with this stranger last night, a man whose hopes and dreams rest with his family- the emphasis on sacrifice and hard work through the facades of his face- the very physical attributes that have aged him so much in so little time. He works- because his family is the driving mechanism in an attempt to realize to broken American dream. I kept thinking that while he works so hard, gets underpaid by the university, here I am standing in front of the class talking about social issues, talking about what students can do in the world, talking so much when I should have just had him come speak to my class.
Inside I was in tears. When I talked to this stranger, I realized how much my father means to me. Really, I dont think I treat him as well as I can. He has seen me grow up and from what my mother has told me- always ask what I am up to- what I am doing--- what awards I got recently, what classes I took, where I am volunteering at, what I am doing next weekend, and the many details that form my life. I realize he asks yet he doesnt want to ask me not because he can't, but because hes afraid. Seemingly, one of my best childhood companions, the father that I always painted with, the one that I assembled bookcases with, the one that let me sit and watch over his shoulders on a a mahjong game, is afraid that I - after four years of attending Berkeley will somehow not be the same daughter I was when i arrived here. he may never know how much he means to me and how much heart I have for him. he worked really hard, was always the negotiator between my mother and i, and always always had the time for me.
at the age of four, he started me with swim lessons and personally woke up early and spend his saturdays driving me and watching me swim. going to my swim meets when i was a kid. waiting 2.5-3 hrs after work so he can sit outside the swimming facility while i swam..and this was after a hard day at work. him, sacrificing a lot for me, never having the chance to enjoy many of the luxuries i've had in my life- i really cant express what the last four years have been for me- but i equally cannot express the bittersweet divides it has unintentionally created.
When I graduate, I want to make my parents proud. I want to be there when they are older. I don't subscribe to the individualism that many American seem to hold. I really want my parents to be a part of my life and I've noticed that now more than ever, my mother and i have been something more akin to sisters or close friends than the authority that my asian american friends associate with their parents. sure my mom worries so much about me, nags me from time to time, but i dont think there is anyone else in the world that cares so deeply for me, that will tell me when i screw up, that will bluntly tell me the things that i never want to hear yet need to hear. for that, thank you mother. | | |
| A slew of events have been happening to me lately- one at a time.
I had a great Spring Break- spend it in Asia and went to Hong Kong, Macau, and Shanghai (huadong area- including Hangzhou, Suzhou, Nanjing, and Wuxi). It was great and I went on a tour base in HK with my bf.
Coming back, I found out my parents were unfortunately the victims of a dispute- a dispute that will probably involve me since I probably know how to fight my way through American injustice more than they do. As their only daughter, I've been automatically given the defense responsibility.
Coming back, I also got sick and went deaf for a day. This is a call to everyone out there- please take care of your health. if you're not feeling well please go see a doctors. don't be like me and wait till you hit urgent care- deaf on your ear and about to pass over before you force yourself to the doctors. the sharp pain i experienced flying back from asia was horrible- i cant even describe it in words. i felt like something was constantly knawing at me. I found out I had a horrible ear infection, bad enough that it left me with echos and deafness for a day. It was only until meds kicked in where I felt any ease of uncomfyness and that took more than a day-- to be exact it was more like 48 hrs.
Then- probably the worst thing of all--- that has making me a bit more cautious-- my dad was robbed at gunpoint-- while i was sleeping- while my mom was taking a shower- while everything in front of my house. they probably have been eyeing at him for awhile and it scares me a lot because i come home late often. i dont even know what i would do if that happened to me. my heart says fight for it, they wont shoot, but its like playing russian roulette, you really dont know what kinda crazy people are out there. i feel like in this time- my dad has been so shocked because really things like that dont usually happen in my neighborhood. we have a low crime rate and i never heard anything like that occuring. it is just scary. they took my dad's wallet and his cell phone and held a gun to him. id be freaked out of my mind. he pounded on our door- yet none of us heard him. it scares me a lot and everyday ive been asking myself why my dad. my dad is so sweet. wouldnt even hurt the ant in my house. he'd dump it in our garden. he always been a very kind soul yet in his life- he has been robbed twice...the other time also in a similar fashion but that was at work in broad daylight -- the robbers held up his entire work unit. At this time, I just want to be there with my family. My dad has been pretty shocked by the experience. he says hes okay but my mom knows better. she can tell and one look into his eyes she tells me that hes scared inside- yet society tells him he cant be- he cant show his true feelings -- not even to his own family. ive been afraid to leave my house. i live in the backyard--- i live in a house separate from my house-- and im scared everyday walking to my "house" within my house for fear of mysterious things lurking in my backyard. ive had nightmares of something like that happening to me and meanwhile ive been heavily medicated since i have a cold and am fighting an ear infection plus jet lag. I pray that my dad will make it out fine. the crappy thing is it happened right before his birthday" literally within 30 minutes. how awful.
I graduate in a month and naturally I should be more excited- but lately it seems that there has been so much going on- so many decisions to make--- and I wish i can just freeze time and not deal with it. On a happy note, there are things that I am looking forward to-- looking forward to graduating, to my graduation celebrations, to acceptance letters from grad schools, to everything else and to open the new chapter in my life.
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| I think it is normal to have some stress every once in awhile.
The last two weeks has been very stressful for me for multiple reasons. Graduating and feeling the graduation date nearing is quite stressful in itself. People asking me what i want to do after I graduate to what flowers I want when i get that diploma. Planning for graduation and organizing the afterparty is stressful, but beyond graduation- the post graduation reality and figuring things out have tired me out. I feel like I've aged this past semester.
For most of the semester, I've handled it pretty well. Granted I work part time (18 hrs a week), teach a class, and am taking five classes (which for me is a breeze compared to the 28 units from last semester). Despite "less" academic work, academics just seem tougher- i feel more slugish and suddenly i need my 6-8 hrs of sleep. I envy my friends who can pull those all nighters and feel all perky the next day before our midterm. I just can't do it anymore. maybe I am getting old but i value sleep and rest much more now- to the extent that if i have to wake up at 4am to study again- i wont. ask me that question 2 years ago, i would say yes.
Then there's the stress of finding a job after I graduate or figuring out my life. I am currently applying to 1 more graduate program- Masters in Asian Studies. I want to get into the program and ideally I can work and go to school at the same time. I dont want to burden my parents with paying for my graduate education even though I know in my heart they are super supportive of my educational endeavors. From the time i was a kid, even though they grew up with much less, they tried their best to give me what i want to prepare me for school- life, etc. to give me the best skillset applicable for the "real world"-- yet 22 years later, i find some of the skills and things i've worked on the last few years- not really applicable to things i want to do now. it's really tough to transition to different careers or skill interest and i am facing that reality as i speak. That being said- I have faith that things will work out. I know that things will-- even if it might not seem like it at first glance or exactly the way i intend on it too- it has its ways of working out.
I really want to improve my academic performance this semester. It looks like I am getting a mixture of As and Bs and while that is acceptable (as a general thought), I have high expectations for myself and improve my grades. I was really striving for a 4.00 this semester, but I dont think its going to happen. A lot of things to do and just not enough time and energy to do it. I also think that my classes dont have the most dedicated Graduate student instructors either. but ultimately- the choice is mine and i need to get my act together before i graduate- and study and focus. i need to finish strong.
I also miss my friends. this past semester, i realize that ive been distant with some people and i feel horrible. among those are my littles especially my female little. i havent really spent that much time with her since she crossed in my fraternity and i feel awful because i am not being a good big. I hope that once i sort this stuff out i can spend more time with her. i miss everyone and look fwd to spending more time with my friends and family once i graduate.
Although my plans are unset right now i do plan on a few things from here to graduation and post graduation.
This week & next week: now that most except 1 midterm (and thats not till mid april) is done with- i am going to watch movies and relax. Asian american film fest in sf!!!! yay!
March- Spring Break- I am going on a trip with my bf. Off to Hong Kong then staying 5 nite/6day tour to Hua Dong/Nanjing/Shanghai/Wuxi area. Then back. Total of 11 days.
May- is graduation month plenty to do but i definetely know i will be partying it up that weekend yupyup -
End of May- plans are sorta up in the air but i am definetely going to Vegas. hang out while baby is there for work. i guess ill be tanning in the desert.
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